


Memorial (for a Wolf-cub)

by Sistermine



Category: Eagle - Fandom
Genre: AU, M/M, WWII
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-28
Updated: 2012-02-28
Packaged: 2017-10-31 21:17:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/348450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sistermine/pseuds/Sistermine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One of them is interviewed about their WWII escapades.  "It was a long time ago.  But wartime memories have a habit of lingering, I find."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memorial (for a Wolf-cub)

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Wolf-cub doesn't make it, sorry.
> 
> Modern AU  
> Disclaimer: No profit made or harm intended.
> 
> Originally written for the [Ninth Eagle LJ fanfic challenge](http://ninth-eagle.livejournal.com/143016.html) September 2011, inspired by the [photo of the wolf-cub](http://i1181.photobucket.com/albums/x424/riventhorn/Eagle/wolfcub2-1.jpg).  
> Also, watched the film "Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy" last week. Obviously left a mark.

Well, you see, there's a point when the accumulation of ashes in the mouth stops you tasting anything, stops you breathing fresh air. It was when he shot the wolf cub that I knew I couldn't do it anymore.

Was it necessary? Well, probably, yes. It might have given away our position, nosying around at the edge of the lake. He didn't blink. But I realised my own – sentimentality - might be far more dangerous than his ruthlessness.

So? So. After that mission was aborted, I cashed in my chips. It was pretty much the end of the war. I still think leaving was the right thing to do. Not without regrets, I must say. Je ne regrette rien. Best ironic song title ever written. I regret much of what we did back than. But there was a war on, the rules were different. I suppose I don't know the bigger picture – the gap in knowledge is always bigger behind the lines. It's very hard to keep track of what's going on - and what it means - when you're submerged in another culture. I'll never know if the greater good was served. Just a foot soldier really. In the end.

Betrayal. That's a big word. It's inevitable in our line of work. You play one side off against the other and hope deep down that you're getting it right. But individuals matter. It's ironic; you're pretending to be someone else, but you have these really intense relationships. You had to be able to live it. You really have to mean it when you're undercover like that, living alongside someone else. Unless you're an incredible actor, and nobody's that good, believe me.

So yes. I meant it. I don't think he ever suspected. I don't know. I convinced myself sometimes.

He saved my life once ... well, possibly more than once. And yes, I saved his. We really only had each other to rely on a lot of the time, and it wasn't a quick in-and-out kind of job, a clear objective; there was a lot of uncertainty. We also had a lot of time to fill. People forget, reading all these action thrillers supposedly about the war. A lot of war is boring. “Hurry up and wait” was the motto of the army when I did my basic training. Very apt, even in the spying game.

No, he never made contact. He never knew my name, my real name – or even that I had a real name. Though there was a time, once, when I wondered. You do get very involved. And like I said, it was wartime, and a lot of … the rules were different.

No, I never found out what happened to him – disappeared off the map. I did try to find him, once. Years later. I'd had a bit of a down patch, got divorced, that sort of thing. Never was much good at it, settling down. We never had children. I think, somehow, she knew my heart wasn't in it. So, anyway, yes, I looked for him. Had a romantic notion I could settle my debts, or something. But … the trail was cold. The eagle had long since vanished.

Would I be surprised? You bet I would. He was a double agent too?

Well. Fancy that. Fancy that.


End file.
